On confidence...

I have had confidence issues my whole life, wondering if I am good enough, doubting it, etc. While I think I have made vast improvements in how I view myself, this subject is on my mind lately, mainly because some friends are struggling with their view of themselves. So, I share some thoughts here on confidence...

Confidence is contagious. So is lack of confidence.
~ Vince Lombardi

One thing I have learned over the years is that although others may give us boosts of confidence, our own view of self—in order to be true and effective in our life—must be just that: our own. That is what makes it both so powerful and yet so difficult, I think. For myself, I don't want to be overly arrogant with a false view-of-self, believing I am better than I am. An analogue to my view of confidence is my view on driving a car: I prefer to err on the side of caution!

All you need is ignorance and confidence and the success is sure.
~ Mark Twain

...and yet I have seen a lot of injury from my lack of seeing value in myself, or thinking I have confidence when it is not from the right source...

The person who seeks all their applause from outside has their happiness in another's keeping.
~ Dale Carnegie

...so I don't want to be inaccurate on the low side of my self-esteem...or on the high end...but just right, accurate, true...

Nothing profits more than self-esteem, grounded on what is just and right.
~ John Milton

...so, what is best then? How do we find a balance, or is it even possible? I would submit that it is in theory! While I am seeking that actuality, and encourage any and all reading this to do so as well, I find the following possibly helpful in pointing direction to get us started, or encouraged along the path of self-worth discovery...

Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.
~ Dale Carnegie

Be courteous to all, but intimate with few, and let those few be well tried before you give them your confidence.
~ George Washington

People who have given us their complete confidence believe that they have a right to ours. The inference is false, a gift confers no rights.
~ Friedrich Nietzsche

...seemingly unfortunate at times, it seems that our hard times can actually help shape us, as a 'diamond in the rough', so to speak...

Adversity, and perseverance and all these things can shape you. They can give you a value and a self-esteem that is priceless.
~ Scott Hamilton

I cannot give you confidence or esteem in yourself, but I can remind you of it and encourage you to seek the balance between caution and arrogance. I can offer you the knowledge that I have of your worth as incalculable. I also know that that means so very little if you don't believe it.

You have then the truth of your worth, and where you are. If these two positions are not aligned, then I recommend seeking the truth of your worth. If your actual worthiness of esteem is the center of a spectrum, then to believe you are above that center is to be disconnected and overly inflated in yourself, and to believe you are below that center is like preventing yourself from seeing where you ought to be. I propose that the trick is finding the happy medium of true self-esteem. I hope some of the above thoughts might help in your quest...and mine.

While other, imperfect people around you may try to buoy you up, tear you down or treat you indifferently at most they/we can only remind you of your worth, we cannot give it to you or take it away. That is up to you. I am here to remind you of your worth, but mostly I hope and pray that you find within yourself a glimmer of that happy medium. It is priceless, I hear. I believe that it is so, because YOU are priceless.

With love.

A thought for today...

“Philosophers have argued for centuries about how many angels can dance on the head of a pin, but materialists have always known it depends on whether they are jitterbugging or dancing cheek to cheek.”

— Tom Robbins

Do you like to read?

So, I thought since I haven't been posting for several months I would share with you some of what I have been up to since my last post. The stack of books above is what I was up to the majority of the time I was not blogging, just since January 4th of this year. One quarter's worth of books, for three of my four classes (one class did not have any textbook), and not including the electronic files that were required and/or recommended. It's a good thing I like to read, I think! The bitter with the sweet...it was intended as my last quarter as an undergraduate student!

On that note, I would like to thank ALL of my wonderful family and friends who have been the best cheerleaders any student could ask for in the journey of formal education. It has been long. It has been hard. It has been worth it...as far as I can tell! It does not feel like the reality of being done (for now, at least) has hit yet. Maybe it will when classes start tomorrow & I won't be going! Yeah, that might help!

My no-textbook class was a blast...so much fun! Computers for Poets--intended to teach non-geeks a little about technology. We made web pages all quarter, it was awesome! I'm so far from where I'd like to be, but I've learned a lot in the last several weeks. My projects are currently still up on the school web server, for the unseen future. I don't know how long they will be available, but here are some of my favorites if you'd like to check them out: final project (about me), Biographical sketch of Dr. Englebart and Ocean Animals .

I would like to leave you with a thought which I have heared iterated in many forms in the past, credit to all who have encouraged me with it: "Don't let your schooling get in the way of your education!"

Love to you all!

I Love America!

This video is one of the cutest and sweetest (not to mention amazing) renditions of our National Anthem that I have ever heard! I enjoy singing and find their vocal talents inspiring and lovely to listen to. These girls have incredible harmony, not to mention a lot of poise and overall talent.

Today has been a simple day (Hello, laundry!), but also one of reflections (Thanks, laundry!). This video speaks loudly about some of what I am grateful for in my life, and I find it inspiring as well, so I wanted to share with you today. I love America and all that she has stood for and through amidst some of the darkest times in the world's history, even as young as our nation really is. I pray that we will never forget what we have been blessed with, whether born an American or blessed to come into this nation and become an American.

May you have a blessed day, and enjoy being free on so many levels and in so many ways!

Our Flag

Somehow I knew...

...some of the items on my 'Some Fun Facts' post would lead to some questions. Thanks, mom, for your comments & questions. I decided to respond in a post, since this was looking like a really long comment response to your comment!

#1: Are there stories to go with T-Bobb or Skittlebug?

These are two of my nicknames...


"Skittlebug" is the invention of my sister Jill, who called me this when we were younger because I loved (and still very much like) Skittles! Come to think of it, she still uses it every now and then, and even got one of our nieces calling me Skittlebug, too-oh, so cute!

(AVOIDED PICTURE...you'll understand why)

"Bobb" is a family nickname that has obscure origins as we don't all agree on how it started. As my memory serves, it started at a point in our lives when my oldest brother and his wife were living with us and they had a 'pet' daddy-long leg which they named Bob. I learned about this pet while helping my sister-in-law on a project of some kind. We took a short break and she laid on the bed and announced 'Bob's dead.' To which I inquired and found out that the rest of Bob's story, including that one day Mrs. Bob appeared...only to eat Bob shortly afterwards. Well, in our family of 11 or 12 at the time, "Bob" slowly became used in a wide variety of ways, including as a substitute for anything else (e.g., "Please pass the bob", meaning something like "Please pass the ketchup") until my brother Justin started calling us Bob. Then we had to distinguish which Bob he was talking to, hence the T-Bobb for me, and Mom-Bobb, etc. The second "B" got added at some point, I think to distinguish between anyone actually named Bob from our family nicknames. It continues to this day...beware The Bobb and the Bobbs!

That's my story, and I'm sticking to it! ;-)

#2: Why is 20 your favorite number?


It is the day of my birthday, which is where it started for me, but it also came in handy growing up in any situation where I needed to pick a number, and has even been 'lucky' at times...so it stuck, and still sticks today!

#3: Tell about being on TV.

I've had a few opportunities, none of which may amount to much excitement, but do allow me to say I've been on T.V.!

My family (mom and some of my siblings and I-at about 12 years old) did a commercial for a local grocery store at one point, so it was of course an international sensation...haven't you already seen this one? The store managers liked us, and thought it was a great publicity gig to have such a large family using their store...hence, we were picked. It was fun, even though I felt a little silly...hadn't I already put enough cereal boxes in a grocery cart previously to be able to waive the rehearsal? Well, if it looked professional then I am satisfied...

My family was also shot for a news blurb on a local milk bank (don't know if those still exist) who had helped my mom and oldest sister right after she was born, prematurely. They were doing a story on the milk bank itself and did a follow-up on my sister about 6 years later (so, I was about 2 years old), to show how the bank did help mothers and infants at crucial times. I love how the news reporter announced that my sister had grown from a tiny infant into a healthy little girl...like we should think she was expecting something else-another species, perhaps-by how she said it, though I may not be capturing the hilarity here. That experience was easy, I suppose...sit on the couch and smile at the camera guy...

I've also been in parades when I was younger (again local television of international acclaim), which were broadcast and always fun to see who got in the shot. I'm sure I got at least an elbow in, or something! Plus, David and I this past July 3rd were supposed to be on the 6 o'clock news as we attended a patriotic gathering to discuss the current state of our nation. We didn't rush home to see it, but rest assured that once again I have made the international stage of fame...